Trying to Mom the "right" way

 

Is it just me or does anyone else feel like they are constantly asking for advice on what’s right for their child?

Since Charlotte was born, I tried to figure out the “right” baby accessories to have in our home, the “right” baby toys, and the “right” bottles to mimic breastfeeding. Then as she started to eat solids, I wondered when was the “right” time, the “right” first food, and how to serve it to her.

Maybe it was my enneagram 1 personality always wanting to do everything the “right” way. Or maybe it was just my Mom instinct wanting the best for my daughter.

What I found was that everyone said something different, and often times with great confidence. I would talk with one Mom, and they would tell me to do it one way. I would leave confident with the decision to do it that way.

Then, I would talk with another Mom that had opposing advice with the same confidence! I would then be entirely confused, because both things worked for their children. Which one was going to be right for Charlotte?

As I’ve grown to realize in 16 short months (I still have a lot to learn), every child is different. What worked perfectly with one child was a total disaster with another.

Thank goodness for the million and one baby products out there! I’m not just talking about baby products, though. I’m talking about the difficult stuff; handling the tantrums, meal times, drop offs, social skills, walking, talking, attitudes, and everything else.

Every child is different and therefore requires a different response from us in each situation. Raising a child, is a relationship and with each child, that relationship is entirely unique.

We have different relationships with everyone in our lives, why would our children be any different?

What works perfectly with one child, might not work with the next. This means sometimes we have to alter the way we handle a situation depending on our child’s need at a particular moment or in a particular situation.

It’s important for us to get to know our children, their personalities, love languages, things they like, and things they dislike. This helps to know what works best when our children are having a hard time.

One thing that helps getting to know what’s best for your child is spending 5 minutes of “special" time” with your kids each day. This time is child led play, whatever your child wants to do! Avoid questions or homework, and just follow your child’s lead on what they want to build or play! This is a great way to learn about the things your child loves and how they enjoy connecting to you.

Enjoy this special time with your child and tell me in the comments below what you did !